Thursday, May 8, 2014

How to resolve issues in the church

How should issues be resolved in the church? They should be resolved according to how Christ would resolve them. They are the following ways:
Confront the person with whom you have an issue with. My way of approaching someone is Praise the Lord, may I speak with you? Always start off in a nice, sweet, positive, calm, and simple way. If you start off positive, it will end positively.Don't come off as strong, defensive, or negative (it wont end in a positive way).
When you talk with that person don't blame the person. Say I feel this way when you talked to me in this tone or I would appreciate it if you talked with me this way instead...
When you talk with the person, make sure you get everything off your chest that bothered you when that person did such and such. If you don't get everything off your chest, then you will continue to be bothered by what he or she did or said to you.
Respect the person you are talking to. Don't just say anything in any kind of manner and don't approach them in any kind of way. Don't give them the wrong vibe, which would be a negative vibe. (Reminder: Negative attitude= Negative Outcome).
Show compassion. Be willing to forgive. Say sorry if you did something to them. They should apologize if they did you wrong.
Sometimes you will come across people that will not acknowledge their wrongdoings. What you can do is just tell them you were upset with this..blah blah and just pray for them. Remember, no matter what you have to keep going on with your life.
If you hold things in or fester, you are going to suffer. Holding grudges makes you bitter and turns you into a person that you don't want to be. It's so much easier to forgive and forget, rather than hold stuff in and not forgive. Forgiving is asking for freedom for the hurts you encountered with someone or someone who did you wrong. Ask God for forgiveness. If you did that person wrong, ask for their forgiveness. In the end, if you choose to forgive God is going to work it out where you will forget what that person did to you.
Another thing to add: Talk to the person in person, do not email an issue to them (most people cant determine the tone in an email conversation, so its better to talk in person/ some statements can come off offensive to them).
Don't text an issue either.
It's okay to talk about the issue over the phone, but it's better to do it in person.

How should a Godly Leader, Authority leader in the church Be?

How should a Godly Leader or Authority figure be like in the church? They should be like the following:
 They should respect others in the church (towards all ages)
They should show love towards others (God is compassionate)
They should be like Christ
They should not punish members for doing wrong
They should pray for themselves and their church members
They should remember that when the bible says, "Obey them that have rule over you," that does not mean they can make you do stuff. God gives all his people freewill, they must decide what path they are going to take. They should persuade you to do what's right, but should never force you to do what's right. You have to make that decision alone.
They should not complain about issues in the church, they need to pray and fast about those things.
They should never discuss people's issues over the pulpit to the church. The bible says you need to confront issues with people that you have an issue with, you should never discuss this with others it creates issues.
They should approach you the right way. They should have a right attitude and a right tone.
They should be willing to forgive easily. Should not make you stand before the church when you confess your sins (this is a form of punishment). God does not punish us for our wrong doings, we may suffer from the consequences, but he does not punish us).
God is longsuffering and they should have this characteristic.
God is peaceful. Make peace with all men. Godly leaders and authority leaders need to remember this too.
God is merciful and graceful. Godly leaders and authority figures/leaders should be like this.
Practice what you preach.
Own up to your mistakes with people and be willing to apologize
Don't make unnecessary comments to church members that's not needed.
Be firm in what you say to people, but don't be too firm
Preach what's in the bible and leave your opinions about things out.
Make standards that make sense and don't confuse people about standards. They will more than likely question why you made certain standards. It's easy to say obey them that have rule over you for every standard, but the reality is the person is still going to be confused about why there are certain standards that don't make sense.
When you make people sit on the back seat or when you gossip about a person that did wrong, that's not showing love. You make them feel like they are unworthy, not loved, and not needed. God would not treat anyone that way. We are supposed to encourage people to do right and show love. God grants repentance, and he will have mercy and grace on whomever he will. God's love never fails and leaders have to remember to always show love.
Don't be so strict is another recommendation.




Monday, December 9, 2013

How to love one another in church, society, school, work, home, etc. (Show Love to Everyone)

I have observed people throughout my church and even assessed myself. So, I have come up with a lot of ways that we can show love to people throughout our church, in our society, at school, work, home, etc. The following ways to show love:
Compliment that person
Encourage each other and lift that person up.
Do not talk about each other. Do not believe in the gossip about that person. Do not create gossip by spreading it.
Be kind.
Be respectful.
Be honest.
Be truthful.
Watch how you say things to others
apologize if you are wrong or if you offended that person
Do not be rude. Love is never rude nor boastful.
Interact with others in the church
Give them a hug or handshake
Do unto others as you would want them to do unto you.
Don't assume any information about a person unless, you have valid information.
Pray for one another (this is key)
fast and pray for the church and individuals as often as you think you should.
Be a blessing to others. Be a blessing instead of a curse.
Show the love.
Don't hold a grudge, forgive.
Hold a short conversation: ptl, how are you doing? God bless you. (Do not try to carry on a lot of conversation unless you know that person)
Don't be jealous or envy that person.
Hug people and ptl with people you do not know in the church well or to a stranger.
Make people feel welcomed.
Love instead of hate.
Be patient with one another.
Be forbearing in love.
Be non judgemental. Do not hang other people's mistakes/sin over their head.
Wish the good in others instead of malice or illful will.
The bible commands that we show love to one another
I will link some research on this topic and how you can show love in the church and beyond the church:
http://www.jdgreear.com/my_weblog/2012/08/hospitality-outside-the-church-matters.html
http://www.christianity.com/print/11631555/
http://pastors.com/7-simple-steps-to-first-rate-church-hospitality/
http://www.evangelismcoach.org/2013/conversational-questions-for-church-greeters/
http://thomrainer.com/2013/10/29/why-we-must-love-unlovable-church-members/
http://www.churchleadership.org/apps/articles/default.asp?articleid=42354&columnid=4545
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/henry-g-brinton/christian-hospitality-is-key-to-being-an-inviting-church_b_3240301.html
http://www.evangelismcoach.org/2012/duties-of-church-hospitality-committee-or-team/
http://www.willmancini.com/2010/11/guests-at-church-10-mind-blowing-facts-to-fuel-your-hospitality-ministry.html
http://www.thrivingchurch.com/LinkClick.aspx?fileticket=2fi1h2-0t98%3D&tabid=125&mid=866
http://ministrytodaymag.com/index.php/ministry-outreach/246-church-growth/19849-church-health-how-do-you-show-god-s-love
http://www.newhopedigital.com/2013/04/experiencing-gods-love-in-the-church-book-club-guide/?doing_wp_cron=1386610407.7352380752563476562500
http://bible-truth.org/msg104.html
http://www.naccc.org/CMSUploads/31_Twenty-Four_Ways_to_a_More_Hospitable_Church.pdf
http://david.dw-perspective.org.uk/da/index.php/writings/grace-magazine-kenya/grace-magazine-201001-love/encouraging-love-in-the-local-church/
http://www.briandoddonleadership.com/2013/05/13/10-ways-to-show-love-to-pastors-and-church-leaders/
http://www.alanknox.net/2013/05/so-why-does-the-church-have-a-love-problem/

How to win more souls for Christ

So, over the years I have witnessed to a few people and invited a few people to my church. So, recently I have thought about why these potential peoples did not show up or take me up on my offer. I am going to share some methods that are not the right way to win souls over vs. the right way to win souls. The wrong way to witness to anybody is "you need to be saved", "you will go to hell," or "you ain't saved." One final thing you should not discuss is church standards, they do not belong to the church yet. If you say any church standard, let it be the dress code and the word of God.  Now, I have never said this to any individual, but I know for a fact that this is the wrong way to witness. Do not do this. If you want more souls to be saved here's the right way to witness: Do not be judge mental. If  people know you are judging them, more than likely they will not want to be saved. It's okay to read the word of God and show them a scripture to get your point across. If you two start arguing about what's the right way to be saved, you can just give up on that argument. Let God be the Judge. Let that unsaved person reflect on what you said and what they know to balance out which one they should follow. If they do not follow what you said there is really nothing else you can do. If they follow your way of being saved, then ok you did something right. Other ways you can win an individual over is by: sharing your experience of how God saved you and why you have been blessed ever since (talk about repentance, your experience of being baptized, and being filled with the holy ghost). Quote some scriptures. Never give up on that individual. Give that person hope. Smile. Encourage and uplift that person. Let them see the light (God) in you. Letting them see the light that God gave you attracts people to you. This worked for me before I had the holy ghost. I started seeing more light and I knew something was missing in my life. I had to ask for the holy ghost and God gave me the holy ghost, but you have to want it and you have to ask for it. Another way to get people saved is be sincere. Simply invite the person to church. Live your life according to Christ. Don't look down on them or let them think that you are any better they are. Remember that we were once sinners and we still sin. No one is perfect on this earth. You have no right to judge anyone else. Take the speck out of your own eye, before judging someone else.   We have to remember that it takes time for that person to change or want to change. You can not hurry the process of them being saved, be patient. Let God work on that person. You can't make nothing happen, you can't save that person (they have to want to be saved). Do not gossip about that person. Remember: You are this person's hope and so is God. God is hope for the whole world. Remember what God did for you on the cross. One last final thing to remember is : There will be a few individuals that will want to be saved and some may not. Some may be looking for a church or something else, and there are some that are looking for a relationship with Christ, but there is always someone who wants to be saved.